The Quiet Work of Getting Your First Users

The Question Everyone Asks (and Rarely Means Literally)

Over the last day, I’ve seen the same question asked a dozen different ways.

How do I get my first users?

It shows up as tactical curiosity — Which channel? Should I post or lurk? Do I DM people or wait? — but underneath, it’s almost never about marketing. It’s about something more fragile.

It’s about standing at the edge of something you’ve spent months building, often alone, and realizing there’s no algorithmic handoff from “product” to “people.” No moment where the system just picks you up and carries you forward.

As a product strategist, I’ve been in enough rooms to recognize this moment. The spreadsheets are ready. The roadmap is tidy. The feature flags are clean. And yet the most important question isn’t on the board:

Who is going to care enough to show up — and why would they trust us this early?

That’s the tension running through these conversations. And I think we’re slightly misnaming the work that actually matters next.

The First Step Isn’t a Channel — It’s a Relationship

When someone asks, “What’s the very first marketing step?” I worry we’re skipping ahead to execution before clarity.

Early traction doesn’t come from choosing the right channel. It comes from choosing the right people.

Not personas. Not segments. Actual humans you could name.

In practice, this usually looks less impressive than founders expect:

• One Slack group you already belong to
• A niche subreddit where people complain about the exact problem you’re solving
• Ten former colleagues who trust your judgment

There’s data to back this up. According to First Round, over 70% of early B2C startups get their first 100 users through direct outreach or existing communities, not scalable channels. Not ads. Not content engines. People.

But here’s the nuance we don’t talk about enough:

Public vs. Private Is the Wrong Binary

A lot of founders get stuck asking whether to talk to users publicly or privately. Post or lurk. Launch or hide.

In reality, the decision is simpler and harder at the same time:

Where are people already being honest?

• Public spaces give you unfiltered language and social proof
• Private conversations give you context and emotional truth

The mistake is treating either as marketing. Early on, this is sense-making, not promotion.

If you show up trying to “get users,” people feel it. If you show up trying to understand, they usually lean in.

Reddit as the Shadow Research Lab

One thread that stuck with me asked whether Reddit has ever quietly hurt — or helped — a product without the team noticing.

The uncomfortable answer is: almost certainly.

Reddit isn’t a feedback channel. It’s a memory system. Conversations stack. Tone lingers. A half-true comment from six months ago can shape perception long after your onboarding flow improves.

As a PM, this changes how I think about listening.

We’re trained to prioritize:

• Tagged feedback
• Support tickets
• Interview transcripts

But some of the most consequential signals are:

• Untagged complaints
• Jokes that get upvoted
• “I tried it once and…” comments with no reply

According to Pew, 42% of Reddit users say they research products there before trying them, especially in niche or technical categories. That’s not passive chatter — it’s pre-decision framing.

Practical Reality

You don’t need to respond to everything. You do need to notice patterns:

• Repeated misunderstandings of what your product does
• Emotional language (“annoying,” “felt sketchy,” “not worth the hassle”)
• Comparisons you didn’t realize people were making

This is product discovery happening without your consent. Ignoring it doesn’t make it go away.

Builders Aren’t Failing at Distribution — They’re Avoiding Exposure

Another theme running through these posts: people building genuinely thoughtful tools, getting users, and still feeling stuck.

No revenue. No momentum. No clear signal.

From the outside, it looks like a distribution problem. From the inside, it often feels like fear.

Fear of:

• Being publicly wrong
• Pricing too early
• Asking for money from people who thanked you

I once worked with a solo founder who had 3,000 weekly active users and zero revenue. When we talked, it became clear he’d optimized the product to avoid confrontation.

Free credits. Soft limits. Gentle language everywhere.

What he hadn’t tested wasn’t monetization — it was discomfort.

Revenue isn’t a reward for usefulness. It’s a signal of commitment.

When you delay that signal, you delay learning.

Stripe’s early data showed that products that introduced pricing conversations within the first 30 days of user engagement reached sustainable revenue nearly twice as fast as those that waited for “more validation.”

Not because the products were better — but because the teams learned faster.

The Loneliness Underneath the Tactics

One post asked bluntly: How do you start something without being lonely as hell?

That question deserves more respect than it usually gets.

Early product work is isolating by default. You’re holding uncertainty that other people don’t see. Making decisions with partial information. Carrying doubt quietly so you don’t poison the well.

This is why so many people gravitate toward communities, feedback threads, and “roast my idea” posts. Not just for answers — but for witnesses.

In my experience, the healthiest early teams do one thing consistently:

They Externalize Their Thinking Early

Not as announcements. As drafts.

• “Here’s what I’m trying to understand.”
• “Here’s where I might be wrong.”
• “Here’s the tradeoff I’m stuck on.”

This invites collaboration without requiring commitment.

And it compounds. Founders who regularly think out loud build trust faster — not because they’re confident, but because they’re legible.

What I’d Actually Do This Week

If I strip away the noise and answer the original question honestly — what’s the first thing I’d do this week? — it’s this:

I’d pick five people and try to learn one true thing

Not five hundred. Not a funnel. Five humans who feel the problem.

And I’d aim for one insight that surprises me.

Practically:

1. Find where those people already talk
2. Read until you can predict what they’ll say next
3. Ask one question that shows you’ve been listening
4. Share what you’re building only if it genuinely helps the conversation

No pitch deck. No CTA.

Just presence.

Because early traction isn’t about volume. It’s about alignment.

And alignment starts when someone feels understood before they ever feel marketed to.

The Deeper Pattern I’m Seeing

Across all these threads — marketing, feedback, loneliness, culture — there’s a common thread:

We’re overestimating systems and underestimating trust.

The first users don’t come from clever tactics. They come from moments where someone thinks:

“This person gets it. I’ll give them a shot.”

That’s not scalable. And that’s the point.

The work before scale is quiet, relational, and often invisible. It doesn’t trend. It doesn’t screenshot well.

But it’s where real products begin.

And if you’re in that stage right now — unsure, exposed, doing work that doesn’t yet look like progress — you’re not behind.

You’re exactly where the work actually is.